|Welcome! If you have made it this far, I guess you are curious as to what a Rocket Scientist really is. Do not believe in the true definition of a "Rocket Scientist", because it really is NOT true! The real definition is "a person having expert knowledge of all subjects after having several adult beverages." We know this because actually WE ARE ROCKET SCIENTISTS!|
It all began the "Summer of '96". What a summer it was. My friends lived in Griswold and I lived in Essex, which is about 35 miles away (according to the road sign). They had their tournament schedule all lined up for the summer. Each weekend was a different town and a different course. I was sitting minding my own business an my 5 acre farm being the bored housewife taking care of the garden, the dogs, the yard, the house and golfing the usual Wednesday Ladies Night and sometimes on the weekend, UNTIL I was asked to substitute. That is when the best summer of my life began.
Let's take a moment now to introduce the players. First off I will introduce myself, Sparky, the webmaster. This is my first Web Page so I am still experimenting with different things. Please bear with me while I try to learn this new found pasttime. I will try to keep this site as up to date as possible. In the spring I will publish our tournament schedule and try to post our scores and possible pictures of each course we play.
Next let me introduce Bunny my golf partner in 2-Lady Tournaments. Someone had really bad penmanship when signing us up for a tournament and her last name got transformed into "Bunny". Needless to say she is not happy with this nickname but it seems to work well for everyone else involved.
Next we have Stevie. Her nickname came from the fact that she could not see more than ten foot in front of her. She could never go golfing alone due to the fact that she could not see the ball after it was hit. People liked to follow her around just to pick up all the balls that she lost. We really must find a new name since she has had eye surgery and no longer needs to even wear glasses.
Last but not least is the final of our foursome, Sarge. What would we do without Sarge. She tries to keep everyone in line, but we don't listen. She tries to get everything to go her way, but we don't let it. She would like to be "Colonel" but that position is already taken by her sister. Maybe someday she will be promoted.
Okay, now back to our story. The first tournament with them was Corning. It was a 2-lady tournament and I was paired with Sue (better known after this tournament as "BUNNY"). We did fairly well considering we had never golfed together. We placed in the tournament and also won some money with the side bets that we made with our friends. After a couple of adult beverages we decided we would go back to Griswold to play a little more golf. After a 45 minute drive and a slight reverse direction on the way we were ready to play more. After a few more holes of golf and alot more adult beverages, I finally decided it was time to call it a day. I did not want to go home.
I don't remember exactly where or when I golfed with them next. But I do remember they were all fun. I substituted a couple of times in Shenandoah and again in Sidney where we got rained out. Stevie met the club of death at that course. It was raining, my was it raining. Everything was wet including her grip on the club. It was a short Par 3. She took several practice swings and we knew then that she would never be able to hang onto the club. Well, we were kind of right. She ended up sticking the club head in the ground about three inches while the shaft danced around trying to knock her off her feet. We laughed until tears were rolling. Not long after they called the tournament off and we got to swim home via Farragut. My friends had never heard of Farragut let alone been there before. Ten o'clock in the morning and the adult beverage server at the local establishment asked "Coffee Ladies?" After what we had just been through, I DON'T THINK SO!! We spent some time there and then moved on closer to home. Closer to home for me anyway. They still had a ways to go but then it was still early in the afternoon and not dark. "Can't go home til it gets dark" is the saying I heard quite often. And usually we did not go home until way after dark. That is when it became quite clear that
"Actually We Are Rocket Scientists."
The Sinclair Station. What a classic. I won't mention exactly where this was for fear of getting someone in trouble. But it has such memories. The time someone found an Oscillating Stand Fan in the middle of the street and decided it would make a good ceiling fan after first wearing the screen on their head and pretending they were Chinese. Or the time someone went to the Men's bathroom to get a glass of water. (I don't think it ever got drank.) Sometimes you just have to be there to appreciate the full humor.
The Church! Have you ever had adult beverages besides wine in a Church? It is not a real church but it sure looks like it from the outside. We found out that "we were the entertainment" at this establishment. We leave good tips if we are treated right, don't we Sahara? Many hours were spent here playing Polish Poker. By the time it got dark, we knew for sure "We were definitely Rocket Scientists!"
If you are not convinced by now that we are Rocket Scientists then check back often for some of our more recent excursions. Our winter project (which has only just begun) is to go through the alphabet visiting towns and their local establishments. We have gone through A, B and C. It could be a long winter. Maybe we will be in a town near you very soon.
Last updated January 14, 1999