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This Weeks Best Joke Comes From Matt in Cedar Rapids, Iowa

APPLICATION FOR WHITE HOUSE INTERN
BASIC INFORMATION:
Name: ___ (Honey) ___ (Sweetie) ___ (Babe) (check all applicable)
Age: ___ (21 or under) ___ (not eligible) (check only one)
Sex: _______(Y/N)
Dress size: _______
EDUCATION AND GENERAL KNOWLEDGE:
How many men did you date in college? ___
Typically, what did you do on a first date?
(A) Sex
(B) Oral sex
(C) Both
(D) None of the above
(If answer is D, please disregard remainder of application)
Define "adultery":
(A) Sexual intercourse, including actual penetration and ejaculation,
between a married person and someone other than that person's spouse.
(B) Anything less
(Hint, answer is "A")
Which of the following do not fit within the technical definition
of "improper relationship": (circle all applicable)
(A) An elected official having sex with a 21-year old in the White
House while his wife is in the next room
(B) An elected official using law enforcement officers to solicit
dates for him
What do you think of the novel Lolita?
Have you studied the Fifth Amendment to the Constitution?
OFFICE SKILLS:
Please circle all skills you possess:
(A) Discretion
(B) Lying under oath
(C) Evading service of process
(D) Big breasts
Typing speed: ___ (if unknown, substitute bra size)
Do you know how to check for a wiretap? ___
PERSONAL:
Do you have a younger sister? ___
Describe the type of men you prefer to date:
(A) Young, athletic, intelligent, and filled with integrity
(B) Fat pedophiles
Do you like cheeseburgers? ___
Choose the item below that best describes your
personality:
(A) Naive, insecure, and trusting
(B) Ineligible for this job
How many drinks does it take for you to lose control of your judgment?
REFERENCES:
Do you know any male member of the Kennedy family?
Do you know Kenneth Starr?
UPON COMPLETION:
Please submit this application along with a writing sample (or your
panties) to the White House Staff Coordinator's office. You may
receive a telephone call with further questions. For security
reasons, the telephone caller will not identify himself and will
breathe heavily